Reading internet message boards regarding the Hobby Lobby Supreme Court decision makes me want to gouge my eyes out with a melon baller, drink gasoline, and then set myself of fire. It makes me feel sick to my stomach. MEN are saying “they have no problem with a company not offering…

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  • her: come over
  • me: i can't my dog just fell asleep on my lap
  • her: my parents aren't home
  • me: he is ASLEEP
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Message to everybody in California



Gnarly waves right?

Bruh jus fuckin shredded sum gnarly waves dude yuh gut nuh fuckin idea brah

(via reservoirdogs1992)

34,342 notes

I’m garbage time to take out the trash

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Why the hell was there a black guy in Maleficent?

These people are living in medieval Europe very far detached from any sort of ocean or sea. I’d be amazed if they had even invented a boat yet. Where the hell did the black guy come from?


(via reservoirdogs1992)

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i love it when people misspell bawling and say that they’re “balling their eyes out” like ball so hard my motherfuckin eyes came out

(via schaeferhund)

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Date a girl who is an outlier. Date a girl who lives in a cave and eats more spiders than any human being has any business eating. Who gets found by statisticians who don’t understand their field or methodology that well. Date a girl who skews the statistical data so badly that the entire United States gains a fear of eating spiders in its sleep. Date Spiders Georg

(Source: punwitch, via carefulfearandeadevotion)

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